Our Two Year Journey in Southern Africa: Goodbye, Namibia

It’s nearly impossible to articulate what it’s like to leave your community after 2 years. It’s really such a strange thing. When else will I dedicate two years of my life to people and a place that I know I will leave after a limited amount of time?

The past month has been a whirlwind for my husband and me. Finishing admin work at the school and wrapping up my classes, traveling to Windhoek for a final conference, sorting and packing up our flat, preparing to leave, saying goodbyes… It’s been very full, which makes the time feel as though it’s moving even faster.

Last school assembly - Aaron's soccer team saying thanks

There were many difficult goodbyes – sending our dog back to the States before us, saying goodbye to the 30 other volunteers in our group who began this journey with us, saying goodbye to local friends at our farewell braai, our last school staff function, the last hug I gave to my best friend, and fellow volunteer, Katie. To my surprise, the most difficult goodbye was to the kids. It didn’t matter that some of my high school students drove me half insane on a daily basis, or seemed not to care or pay attention to my English lessons – when I stood before them and said a final goodbye – that, without a doubt, was the worst. I know I’ll be getting on a plane and flying off on another incredible adventure with my husband. But these kids will remain there. These kids whose faces I have seen on a daily basis over the course of 3 school years. And I don’t know if I’ll ever see them again.

I’m probably very similar to most volunteers who ask themselves if they did enough, if there was any impact, if they could’ve done more. This is also the plague of many teachers in general. I can say, though, that I leave with the hope that some seeds were planted. Many times this is how it is for a teacher – hope that they learned something from you. And let go of the things that are out of your control, the things that you cannot change.

This past month has been interesting. Aaron & I have definitely had the up-and-down swings throughout our time here. But as began to see that the finish line was just before us, the dark times really faded into the background, and only good memories were left.

Final sundowner

I know that as time goes on, memory fades. But I hope to hold on to as much as possible from our life here. I want to remember my 7 minute commute through the sand on my way to school each morning, looking out over the vast landscape from my 2^nd story kitchen windows as I washed the dishes, spending many weekends with great friends from the Peace Corps (who have become family to us), the honor of being able to help an 8^th grader learn to read for the first time, hearing summaries of the books kids checked out from our new school library from excited students, watching Aaron coach the soccer team and witness the relationships they built together, sundowners in the hills, the many runs I took with our dog Soraya – our first pet, the giggling group of small children who would sometimes join me while I ran (for as long as they could), staff meetings every morning and the great sense of humor of our staff, potjies, braais, Bullring, Shooters, new friends, class parties, Student of the Month lunch celebrations at Spur, hikes in the open field, playing with our host sisters, teaching English, watching movies on our laptop at home after a long day, ... and these are just memories from our daily lives. I, of course, also want to remember the incredible holidays we had here in Namibia and abroad - Etosha, Sossusvlei, Cape Town, Opuwo, Caprivi, Victoria Falls, Fish River Canyon, etc.

I’m beyond grateful and feel incredibly blessed to have been afforded the opportunity to come to Namibia to live, learn and serve for two years. It feels as if you leave part of your heart behind, as you just suddenly get up and leave the community that you’ve lived in for 2 years. Yet, I’d rather think of it in a different way; that instead I leave with yet a bigger heart, one that's grown because I now carry these people and memories with me forever.